Well, considering I've been here 6 months now, I figure it's due time to begin a new blog. Feeling disconnected from all my faraway friends/family members and with the price of stamps going up and sometimes too lazy to do it the old-fashioned way, this is the best bet.
In case you forgot, where I am: Mill Spring, North Carolina. Population: unknown (really just too small to count). Working in the delicate foothills and all that at a therapeutic healing farm. If you haven't checked out the website already: www.cooperriis.org. (my picture is even on the website. Umhum. I've hit the big time.
Due to confidentiality, I can't write about all the interesting going-ons that I would love to be at liberty to write about and share, as I'm learning more about myself and others everyday. And at the same time, I do want to respect the people I work with and for by allowing them deserved privacy. Maybe that's part of the reason I'm feeling disconnected: when I do talk to some of y'all back home, I just can't get into the details, so the conversation is reduced to, "I'm doing well; same old, same old." Okay, sometimes I say more than that. But not much. You feel my frustration.
In some ways this is going to be a lousy attempt; a failure from the beginning at connection, as my writings will also be reduced to the half-stories and superficialities and descriptions of nature I encounter. It will also probably be free of profanity and stories involving vices (which, mom, you probably prefer--sorry to my more cras friends).
Like: the geese are in full force, flying v-shaped overhead and landing on the fields and lake, here. Meghan (a friend and volunteer here from Fort Smith) and I also landed in the lake yesterday, as we decided to go for a polar bear swim in January. Okay, it was 70 degrees outside, which doesn't make us as tough as say if it was 30 below. But the water was more than chilly. It was piercing.
Last night, we went to the Avett Brothers concert. Living in a bubble community makes going out a little awkward at times. I have next to no friends or acquaintances outside of Cooperriis. I'm the kind of person who easily forgets how to be sociable and outgoing outside of my comfort zone. It's not as easy for me to forget what attractive members of the opposite sex look like, especially when he's singing soulfully with his eyes held shut. The show was really good. I'd put them in the category of Old Crow Medicine show.
I even bought one of their CD's, which I never do. Usually, a burned CD is just fine for my cheap tastes. Being on salary and making some dough makes a difference in these matters. Plus, I just really need some new music in my collection. Luckily, there's a great public radio station here, WNCW, that keeps me updated somewhat on new voices. But sometimes, the station gets too much on a bluesgrass kick, which leaves me wanting what I'm not getting. Are you noticing the themes: want, deprivation, satisfaction, dissatisfaction. Getting paid really splits a person. Or maybe being around mental illness is splitting me. A combination of the two, probably.
Well, that's all the superficialities I can handle for the moment.
(Don't forget to post, or I'll feel like no one cares, and that will only add to my insatiable want to be connected. Thanks for listening; It's not always easy.)
9 comments:
ellen...even though i am with you for these events, it is nice to hear you put it so candidly/frankly in writing. It was lovely seeing grown men sing about loving a woman tenderly. delicious stuff...glad you came with me.
hey miss thing, i mean, missy el, or is it miss yel? anyways, just saw your new blog. good to finally hear your fine writerly voice again.
your dip in the arctic carolina waters instantly brought to mind our lazy sunday at the watershed: slipping on slimy moss-covered rocks, treading through ice-cold water, lounging in the sun on the big wooden platform talking of welding, boys, magazines, music.
i, too, have been listening to mr. waits as of late, blood money to be precise. 'coney island baby', that's what you are to me.
Pretty sure I'm going to enjoy the descriptions of nature encounters, but feel free to throw anything else in there you please.. If I'm hearing about/from you, I'm happy!
Love you!
thanks for the quick posts, friends. hey cale, you're already moving to the ranch. farming in no time. how exciting. you could call your blog, "eat kale's roughage," hehe. is rick and emily joining you right away. i'm hoping rick is not, because i want to recruit him to work here for a few months, before he joins you. let the competition begin.
Ellen it is good to "hear" from you. You've always been a good writer, I hope you're working on some stuff in your spare time cuz your talent shouldn't be wasted. I'm tempted to start a blog but I know myself better than that. I'm still in LA working on that degree. I miss talking to you so I promise sometime in the near future I'll give you a call (It's a new year, you can consider it my New Year's resolution).
glad to see you're back in the ring. don't forget to read my blog, too (isn't that cheap of me!). oh, and keep your ears perked for job openings for MSWs this spring; i've decided to get a job and not go back to school just yet, but am still interested in moving to north carolina.
so good to read your blog Ellen! i hope to visit some day in NC...
Awesome, awesome. And everyone should check out my new blog, it's called I-already-know-what-Ellen's-been-doing
-because-her-ex-husband-hired-me-to-
spy-on-her-and-I-live-in-the-woods-
around-her-workplace-and-oh-yeah-did-I
-mention-that-I-was-a-supersleuth?.com
It's off the chain, y'all. Out the frame. And even though I'm usually about forty feet from you, cloaked in darkness, I still miss you, dear Ellen.
actually, i just found out you have to be separated a year before the divorce goes through in north carolina. so you'll have to change that in your blog title, yo. miss you, lawrence. hope garrison is treatin' you right.
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